Crieff, Mackie, Dunfermline Match Report

Players: Lee, Aidan, Harry, Scott, Sean, Matthew, Alan, Finlay, Dylan, Rory

Desynchronosis is a physiological condition which results from altering the body's circadian rythms. It's better known as 'jet lag' and happens when people travel long distances across time zones. Or when 10-year old boys travel about 40 miles northwards into the Strathearn time zone to play rugby.
It's also the only possible explanation for what happened on Sunday 21st at Crieff when a bunch of good young rugby players forgot that that's what they were and capitulated twice to ordinary opposition.
On a bright but Baltic day our guys played four 10-minute games against Crieff and Mackie who hail from Stonehaven. I'd never heard of them before but they seemed decent enough blokes, even if some of them were a trifle well-nourished.
I regret that there's not nearly as much as usual to write about the day.
The first game was against Mackie whose jersey looked like the one Arsenal would wear at funerals. It started well enough, with Sean bullocking up the park and getting within five metres of the line, only to be brought up short for having only one hand on the ball. A rule which is enforced at this level and there was no try from that move. From the penalty Mackie gave the ball to their big guy who took it on the run and went 40 metres to score.
10 minutes is not very long if you're trying to turn things around. Finlay had a try unfortunately disallowed and then, to rub the salt in, Mackie took an interception and broke through all our tackles to score a second try. 0-2. It was a poor game and Mackie didn't play particularly well, but it was good enough to beat a downbeat Dunfermline performance. OK, it was cold and we'd travelled a long way but we can do better than that.
The second game was against the hosts, Crieff and Strathearn -- ye gods, there's two of them! We had a tighter beginning. There had been a team talk after the first game and although we couldn't hear everything that was being said, there was a prominent Ulster voice telling everyone to tackle and doing so in such an inspirational tone that even Penny the Lab inwardly determined to go strong and low in the next match. Crieff were well-organised and impressive -- much better than when we had played them last. Of course, they didn't have to deal with the desynchronosis. Their running and passing were good but our tackling had been coached back in and Crieff must have been disappointed to see several moves frustrated by a sound defence. Eventually they passed round the defence after a dropped ball and scored in the corner.
Our boys rallied and set up Finlay 20 metres out, allowing him to rotate through three tackles before forcing himself over. This still wasn't the Dunfermline that we've come to expect this season but it was a pity that we lost a very late try at the left flank. 1-2 at the final whistle.
Half the day was gone and we hadn't had a win. While Crieff played Mackie we trained and kept warm, looking at ways to put right what had been going wrong. I'd really like to know where our coaches get their patience from -- I'd happily pay good money for a bottle of it. Whatever they said it seemed to work in the next game against Mackie. The game was scoreless - quite unusual at this level -- but it was heartening to see the Dunfermline tackles containing the main Mackie tactic which was to pass to the big chap on the run, hoping that sheer ballistic force would smash his way through. Sometimes it took a couple of boys in dark blue to stop him but there was no lack of courage, and, on balance, we emerged the stronger of the sides at the end. Once again our best chance of scoring was thwarted by a 2-hand-on-the-ball infringement. 0-0.
The fourth match was Crieff again. The improvement continued and there were glimpses of the sort of performance which had beaten Watsonians and won the Kinross Tournament in previous weeks. Alan and Matthew scored in fairly quick succession before the hosts passed round the Dunfermline defence, rather as Ayr had done a couple of times a fortnight ago. We never looked like losing this one though, and Matthew wrapped it up with a spectacular solo effort just at the end. En passant it's worth noting that the ref in that game came down hard on the Crieff boys for a high tackles. Now that our sons are getting bigger and heavier and faster it's good to see that dangerous play, even if it's not deliberately malicious, will be properly addressed.
So at the end of a cold day in Perthshire we'd lost two, drawn one and won one. The graph is going in the right direction, though from a pretty low base. If the graph stays on that angle of improvement I wouldn't fancy being a Kirkcaldy player next week.

Written by John Fotheringham